How Writing Helped Me Grieve

A couple weeks ago, my best friend from childhood's dad died. I practically lived at their house as a kid, so he was like a second dad to me for years. His death was unexpected and affected me a lot more than I would have thought.

I think one reason I'm writing this blog is because I can see how writing in my daily life helps me improve and connect to others. This became really clear when Jim died. My own and others' writing helped me grieve and heal. Here's how:

• I hadn't seen Jim much in years. The day after I heard the news that he died, I was trying to work but couldn't concentrate. I sat and wrote down a list of memories about him. It helped me remember wonderful things about him I hadn't thought of in years. Some were small, like that he ate peanuts in the shell while he watched baseball games. Others were bigger, like how he always made me feel like part of his family during a time when I really needed that stability.
• My friend's sister wrote a eulogy that reminded me about Jim's greatness and taught me even more about him. I think eulogies are such an important part of a funeral, both for the writers who can work though pain as they write about their loved ones, and the friends and family who need to hear these words to help them grieve.
• My friend's family did a great job displaying things about Jim at the visitation. One thing I especially loved was a display of letters he had written to one of the daughters over recent years. The letters gave her updates about his daily life and a real look into what was on his mind. I could hear his voice as I read a few of them, and felt comforted that they would have those letters forever.

Has anyone really important to you died? Has your own writing or someone else's ever helped you grieve?